allow.

allow
allow
allow
the teacher said
i inhaled & i exhaled
i laid there with my body yoga'd
allow
allow
allow
i want to share
i want to allow
on my first day of 38, 83, 830
allowing the beauty
my birthed body
my belly skin hangs like a drape
my wrists that can hardly hold me up
my swollen knee
alllllloooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwww
that's all i can hear now
i might need you to repeat it for me
my incision is a bit lopsided
my marriage too
cutting & pasting a new priority list
collaging my way
sketching a map
dusting off a compass
turning my ear to the ground
cold, damp, essential
the recipe calls for
gently folding
the egg white of myself
into an old doughy story 
trusting the stainless steel bowl
turning under and over and
waiting for it to take
allowing for all of it

xxxx

birthday post//part 3//gifts.

"it was in her completely loving creative being

that was the complete source of all living."

gertrude stein

beauties! for this post i am sharing what is nourishing me, watering the hungry seeds, feeding my growth of being the best mama & woman i can be in those swatches of depth... in those super precious moments when i can take in the warm words of wisdom being shared in the waves of information, you know, out there in the world!

i guess you could call it my creative human process. i cast my fishing rod and here are some of the incredible fish i have found recently... my feeding times are early morning walks, driving in the car or a few minutes at night before i pass out in bed... the quieter moments.. beauty in this still form.. in the transformative section of the menu... where the words steep inside my voracious pockets of expression, understanding, receiving, intimacy in a 'me too' kind of way, how others are doing it (life i mean) between filling the sigg bottles with water to putting pink polka dotted socks onto luscious little feet, trying to maintain sanity & feed the dog all in one breath. 

i am a believer in giving gifts on my birthday! so here are a few offerings to feed you in the heart & home way.... i am so grateful for YOU! thank you for reading my words, sharing in my journey & feeding me with your stories. i am so happy to have you with me in this, our, beauty love fest.

LISTENING TO....
i just recently started to take my iphone on walks... it's become my 'walking church' when i listen to this amazing podcast called on being. my friend lara sent me an email in the new year that said 'this is your new years gift' and she was so right! it took me 3 months to listen to it and now i am hooked. it's a blend of spiritual, creative, intellectual & political interviews all in one. this is one of my favorite interviews with the awesome sylvia boorstein. this link takes you to the video as well... i listen to these when i am walking or in the car, so i don't watch anything, which has been my experience of this podcast. 

READING...
i am slowly yet consistently getting thru brene brown's, daring greatly: how the courage to be vulnerable transforms the way we live, love, parent & lead. if i could, this would be my white oprah moment... i would send everyone of you this book! i can't wait for that day! anyway, this is such a good one... you want to highlight, underline & put on a t-shirt almost every sentence. 

ON THE RADIO....
loving this one...

ALWAYS LOVING....
everything in this beauty fest of a store....


COVERING UP....
and then there is this for the table.. with every wash it gets better..in the store they have more choices & a lot of beauty wood boards that i could not find on the site.. it's worth a stroll over there...

WEARING//WANTING//ADMIRING....
this designer...  and i will take one of each here. i am really loving this one though... and this one... maybe i want everything here! i have a few of the pieces and i wear them all the time. i love to feel good in what FEELS like me.. that is also super important to my well being.

YES PLEASE....
a week here... or here.... this one looks perfect for right about now. 

may all your wishes come true! love you beautiesxxxx

birthday post//part 2//the cake.

olive oil & olinda orange juice* cake

*gather*

4 eggs (separated)

1 tsp vanilla

1 cup superfine sugar

1/4 cup packed light brown sugar

3/4 cup olive oil

3 1/3 cup all-purpose flour**

1 heaping tsp baking powder

grated zest of 1 orange

1 cup freshly squeezed juice

(about 4 oranges)

1/2 cup pine nuts

sprinkles too!

*rock it out*

turn oven on to 350

you can make muffins or cakes here

you can use (2) 8 1/2- 9" rounds

lay parchment down with some olive oil

and dust with flour if you want to!

whip egg whites in a large bowl until

they are firm & snowy

(keep them in fridge if it's hot)

whip yolks with vanilla

let them bulk up a bit & become foamy

whisk in the sugars

then add olive oil, bit by bit

mixing well after each addition

add the flour, baking powder, orange rind & juice

beat until you have a smooth batter

gently fold in the egg whites

*bake*

scrape 1/2 batter into each pan

decorate with pine nuts & sprinkles

bake for about 35 minutes

make sure top is golden brown

leave to cool a bit before serving

(this will keep for about 4 - 5 days)

BEAUTIES!

this cake is lovely for many reasons....

it's more of a sponge/tea cake which means more

bites more times of the day! the kids love it

which i love because there is no dairy and not a lot

of sugar it's also super fun to decorate & pretty too!

you can make 2 and i LOVE giving food as gifts

*olinda oranges are one of my special finds at the

hollywood farmers market....farmer vicki told me that the reason

why these oranges are so amazing is because they are grown

on old valencia root soil//they are a bit pricey compared

to the other oranges but so worth it!!

**i used cup4cup for the first time with this recipe

and i would say that if you are not gluten sensitive

go for the all-purpose... it was harder to manage the gf flour

because of texture & weight and it just felt super gooey

not fun to handle and the taste? it turned out ok,

kids and husband loved it (my test kitchen)

i still think it's better with the other flour!

happy birthday beauties!

xxxx

birthday post//part 1//everything.

i found this old wish on my walk this morning
i am wondering if it has come true yet
are they still working on it?
making room for it
trying to make it work
within their lifestyle

every time i blow out a candle
i make a wish
usually about health or abundance
i wonder where it goes
what it takes to birth it
you know, make it happen

i want everything

i remember my everything when i
make a left off the 110
move the wet into the dry
soak the egg pan
draw the kids bath
and now, when i finally sit down with you
it's not as easy to remember

i want to feel happy all the time
i want to have a daily nap
& when i start to nap a little
i am probably going to want to nap some more

i want my body to feel better
i want to be friends
i want to eat dinner out
i want to go to the movies
i want to be alone
i want to go on vacation
i want to buy things, like shoes, good quality t-shirts,
blouses, dresses oh and some sandals too

i want a life long membership to empathy
another one for massages, facials and all the up keep

i want a trip, every 3 months,
to check in with me,
meet my husband again
check in with our marriage
our values, our parenting, 
our world that we are creating together

i want to soak inside my voice
sponge bath my way to me
float on the emotional support
that i am so hungry for

where do i ache
what needs to be filled up
the granola in the french terrine
the breast fed breasts
the tears that have been waiting in a single filed line
the wishes
the pink candles
the mourning for days of rest, days for another life perhaps
the gratitude, the blessings of this life
the fragile wrists, fingers, knees & toes

the truth inside who i am, who i want be,
what's growing inside me
my posture & my smile
i don't mean to hurt anyone
i also do a lot of dishes, laundry, toy pick up & feeding the dog

birthdays are an opportunity to go inside
draw the shades & see what is glowing in the dark
what do i need to change, shift, pay more attention to
the conversation is a poem of intentions, values, morals
where do i stand today and where am i headed tomorrow

i don't know how to do anything without a ritual, a swatch
of depth, some warm quinoa, sauteed kale & some flax seed oil

i want to prepare better for death
i want my body to feel stronger
i want to feel flexible, lucid, flowing
i want yoga
i want to sit criss cross apple sauce with my kids
i want to do a push up
i want to experience fearlessness
i want to have sex with my husband
i want sex to be easy, normal, no big deal
i want to make food for sick kids 
i want people to know about the need for beauty
i want to have all the money i need all the time
i want to swim in a warm ocean
i want to give money to those who need it
i want to travel
i want to show my children the world
i want to learn from other cultures
i want to experience more intimacy in everyday moments
i want to be a better parent
i want to stop myself before i lose it
i want to heal all the wounds
i want to trust you
i want to stop wanting so much
i want to hear your everything
xxxx

PAM.

beauties! here is my interview with PAM's alisa donner posted on their blog today! this is part 1 of a 2 part series they are so generously creating with me! if you are inspired by this, share the love to your tribes & comment on the blog too! check out PAM and all the wonderful things they are doing to support & empower the mothers in all of us xxxx (cut & pasted this & mercury is in retrograde so bear with me please) 
   Renaissance Mama: A Kitchen Miracle Worker                 

When I was a newbie mommy I met an amazing woman named Jules Blaine Davis at the Hollywood Farmer’s Market.  She had a son a little older than my daughter, and we had a brief intense conversation.  She closed it by saying we were Renaissance Mama’s.  I remember laughing and thinking, “yes, we are!”   Not too long later Jules and I took a parenting class together by the Echo Parenting Center, and she began the creation of what I believe is one of her life’s work: creating a healing kitchen and encouraging other mothers to do the same, actually teaching them.  To expand out from our breasts as we wean our babies and create beauty and healing in the kitchen for our families and our souls.  It is a complete pleasure for me to introduce you to Jules Blaine Davies, Renaissance Mama and Kitchen Miracle Worker.  This is part 1 of a 2 part interview series.

AD:  You have a unique approach to food as healing.  In my opinion you go beyond medicinal, it is a holistic approach to nourishment, spiritual really.  Can you explain your vision more clearly?

RM:  I believe that food is life. The adventure of how we feed ourselves, how we gather our food, how we create this dance in our everyday lives is a creative and spiritual act. We carry all of our stories, our fears, our dreams, all of what we come with into the kitchen. It can be intimate and vulnerable as we have an opportunity to meet ourselves in a white peach, a golden beet, a deep & juicy cherry tomato, or even defrosting edamame! Turning on the fire, making food a priority, hearing our stories of where we came from and how we were fed are the main ingredients to making a life that nourishes us in a deeper way.

My work is about inspiring people to cook inside their super busy lives. It’s about pointing to the beauty inside the mess, healing ourselves inside a zucchini mint soup, freeing our resistance, learning to feed each other, make our own medicine, sate our creativity, feed our hunger for freedom while feeding our family. It’s about worth, love, and beauty. It’s also about killing a few birds with one stone.
I mean… welcome to motherhood!

If a doula, a home economics teacher, and a Jewish grandmother were going to have a baby, that baby would be a kitchen healer!

AD:  I first met you at the Hollywood Farmer’s Market when Ocean and Roma were newbies.  I know you still shop there regularly, can you tell us why you love that market so?

RM:  The farmer’s market is all BEAUTY all the time! It’s my beauty church. It not only inspires everything I create in the kitchen, it also reconnects me to the source, to my desire to cook, to my story, to my palette for that week….then I bring it all home and see my family eating what I gathered.  Sticky strawberry fingers and cherry cheeks, being fed by my freedom; this for me is the best part!

Also, the market is an incredible moment in time. We all get ready for the event, the farmer & the consumer, in the hopes that we will feed each other with our offerings. It has ritual and hard work woven into the fabric of coming together to be fed. The farmer and I have the same goal: we are both hungry. The farmer wants to feed me what she/he has grown and I want to fed by the farmer so we can continue this relationship. We have traveled to meet here at the market. We are aligned in our meeting, in our exchange, in our desire to keep each other going. I feel that this exchange is highly nutritious.

AD:  What do you look for in a vendor/farmer to pledge your loyalty to?

RM:  I love this question! I look for LOVE in my farmer & the team. I look for a genuine smile, a kindness and an appreciation for my offering to his/her offering. I look for a generous spirit, a trust in each other, that we will tell each other what we need to know. There is a different kind of energy on the food when you buy it from the farmers hand. If that love is not there, it will not be in the food, and love is the main ingredient to everything delicious.

AD:  Tell us about your love fests!

RM: It’s all in those two words. Love fests are pure joy happening in random moments throughout a day. Don’t quote me on the exact definition as a love fest can be custom fit to any lifestyle! I just might inspire one to happen when I am having one! We can all do that! They are contagious. Love fests come in all shapes & sizes. It can be our morning snuggle fest with my family or a smoked salmon, radish, Persian cucumber, avocado sandwich that took a few minutes to make. Please come and experience a love fest in my kitchen, or a miracle in your kitchen. They are flexible and love to travel!

Truly Jules creates love fests and beauty in her kitchen on a daily basis. Usually she provides step by step instructions on how you can re-create one in yours too.  Find her at instagram @julesbdavis // twitter@julesbdavis // facebook @julesblainedavis or her blog !  If you live in LA, she does individual consulations and group nourishing kitchen sessions.  They are full of laughter, joy, and amazing food!
 

Jules Blaine Davis is  a consultant based in Los Angeles who inspires women in the kitchen: a kitchen healer! She is also a food blogger, guide, teacher, and mama!

Interviewed by Alisa Donner, MSW, LCSW, Co-Founder of PAM, and mom to an amazing wonder.

roots.

*beauties*

here is a tip:

rooted basil is AWESOME.

i bought this 2 weeks ago

at the farmers market

from a sweet farm called the eden of.....

(yes all the dots are in the name too)

they are the tent with the lady bug flags

they sell gorgeous corn, lettuces,sunflowers & more...

i put this basil in a big ball jar with some water to cover

the roots and it continues to flourish & grow

it's so happy here which is so rare for basil in a ball jar!

it's not only pure beauty on the table

but it's useful and i can just grab some leaves

for a fancy water, some quickie pesto or raw on top of warm pizza

name it.. you can do it

it's the best purchase yet! 

i wanted to share it with you

so when you see it

don't be afraid of the roots

embrace, buy & put it in a big ball jar!

xxxx

and.....

birthday

miracle

july 26

10 - 1pm

my kitchen

$100

2 spots left

xxxx

birthday miracle.

you say it's your birthday

well it's my birthday too yeah

sing it beauties!

there is a july miracle coming up 

and it's my annual birthday miracle!

a menu inspired by the local summer bounty of

BEAUTY

miracles are gatherings in my kitchen

where i nourish you & your stories

with abundance, beauty & love

the miracle is about creating a space

to feed each other in a new way,

learning how to create delicious food

inside super busy lives

& to receive this beauty in a new way

you will leave inspired with new ideas,

excited to cook & your hands full with

the best produce from the farmers market

(your belly's full too!)

FRIDAY//JULY 26//10 - 1PM

JULES KITCHEN

$100//reserve your wood bowl

ASAP/email me here

rule # 58 in michael pollan's

'food rules/an eater's manual'

do all your eating at a table

check that @ the miracle

XXXX

watermelon love fest.

*beauties*

i have a sweet story to share with you

it aligns with my mission & mantra

to inspire you with beauty & create cooks out of y'all

last week i had a kitchen healing consult

with a mama who won 'me' at a school auction :)

(i became the lucky one)

as i approached her front door, i gently handled/petted

a few of her lavender stalks as i love to smell the earth on my hands

they were so abundantly oily that foam, yes, white lavender foam

emitted from the lavender! i thought i had pumped EO soap into

my hand from the dispenser maybe this is where they got the idea?

that was the first nurturing offering of the morning

this beauty mama came to the door & welcomed me

into her sweet home where the first thing you can see

from the door is the kitchen....it is the center of the house,

open for all to see & be nourished with some wood board love

and connection to all things food & love

we started talking about her home, her sweet children & books about

autism & diet, gut related issues, flora & birth control pills,

tuna fish & so much more...just another day in the office...

then she offered me a drink....

so, as you may or may not know,

my work is all about healing kitchens & changing lives;

recreating a connection to the kitchen that inspires us to cook &

then learning how to cook inside a life with so much busy, busy, busy.

thinking about food, feeding ourselves, nourishing our world in a

whole new way creating a food culture that resonates

with source, health, love in our homes

so with this said, she asks if i want a fresh pressed juice

i almost passed out

she just started taking whatever she had out of the fridge

she was doing a kind of mumbling chant of run on ingredients

to see what i thought but not really because it was what she had

it was so beauty love fest i can't even tell you

she gets her champion juicer out or something like it

the old school one with the super long neck that turns round & round

anyway - she started with watermelon & it went something like this

*watermelon love fest*

*gather*

super sweet watermelon - chopped up

meyer lemons - squeeze to taste/zest too!

persian lemon cucumber - peel if blending/nothing if juicing

lemon verbena - a little goes a long way//keep tasting

*juice it up*

this is definitely a make it your own kind of dance party

i did this in the blender

but next time (to reach her goodness)

i will use the juicer

they are both good with the best sourced produce

i put everything in and pressed play

cooling it or putting on ice is also so good

what is so amazing about this?

she has it in her to nurture & nourish this beauty

(we all have it in us)

she took out whatever she had & made it feel like a party

(she was growing lemon cucumber & lemon verbena)

she created it on the spot with whatever lead her to it

chapter 4 in the book that i need to write!

(we can do this)

don't wait for the party as it's already

started with your arrival into the kitchen

(get the bread knife & cut up some fruit)

her creation inspired me to make it at home & share it with all of you

these are the kinds of conversations i want to have!

it made me feel special, cared for & nourished

which i feel could just be an enzyme

xxxx